Gotcha
by Astra Greenleaf
Summary: What happens when you mix Harry Potter, water guns and paranoia? Chaos. Trust no one and remember it's just a game...half the time.
1. Default Chapter

Hello, I've given up on romance and back to comedy! Yay! Any way here's Gotcha! (Which is a sequel to The Field Trip)!  
  
"I'm telling you Hermione! Bungee jumping is not against the rules." Ronald Weasley was desperately trying to persuade his friend of six school years to bungee jump out of the astronomy tower.  
  
"Yes Ron, it is." Hermione stated firmly.  
  
"I think Hermione's right, Ron." Harry was gazing out the window worriedly.  
  
"Fine, I'll do it alone." Ron turned swiftly and took a great leap out the window. Harry reflexively dove out after him. This resulted in a rather interesting display of Ron clinging to Harry while upside down thirty feet from the ground.  
  
Hermione shook her head at the stupidity of men as Ginny rounded the corner. She explained the situation at Ginny's prompting and they both shook their heads at the idiocy of the opposite gender.  
  
This caused Hermione to wonder where Draco was at the moment. She glanced out the window into the gardens beneath her dangling friends, trying to concoct a solution to their predicament and saw the metallic blonde appear from behind a bush.  
  
"Speak of the devil." Hermione muttered. She watched her boyfriend strolling with Pansy Parkinson along the wall where Harry and Ron hung precariously.  
  
Pansy paused mid-sentence as she caught sight of Ron. She gestured to the Gryffindors drawing Draco's attention. He gazed up and quickly decided he didn't want to know.  
  
As Ginny joined Hermione in the quest for an idea Professor Minerva McGonagall came around the corner, took one look at the situation and ordered all six of them to be in her office in five minutes.  
  
Draco's jaw fell open "But I, they, ah fine." He trudged up the fourteen flights of stairs with Pansy.  
  
They reached McGonagall's office and sat down. "Now as you should have known, Bungee jumping is strictly forbidden and the punishment for any sort of involvement is scrubbing the castle walls for three months."  
  
At this information a collective groan issued from the students. Minerva raised her hand for quiet. "However, since perhaps one of you is innocent" she looked pointedly at Hermione "I'm prepared to offer you a deal."  
  
McGonagall disappeared behind her desk and extracted six water guns. She distributed them among her bewildered students. "You six are going to play a game called Gotcha." Draco lifted his water gun and inspected it. "What is this thing?"  
  
Hermione leaned over "It's a muggle toy, by pulling that trigger the end squirts water." She whispered.  
  
Draco nodded as Minerva continued. "All of you place your names in this hat."  
  
Everyone wrote their names and placed the slips in McGonagall's outstretched hat. Minerva shook the hat fiercely and held it back out. "Now everyone draw a new name."  
  
The pupils did so and waited for further instruction. "Now, the person you hold in your hand is the person you are going to hunt down and eliminate. You eliminate them by spraying them with these water pistols. The last person standing wins. You are also permitted safety zones, places where people can't legally attack you. Your common rooms, Hagrid's cabin and the Great Hall will be the safe zones. If you spray your attacker in self defense they are eliminated for an hour. Any questions?"  
  
The children shook their heads. A grin spread over Draco's face, this should be interesting.  
  
Hermione groaned. How the hell would she pull this off?  
  
Ron laughed. He was gonna enjoy this.  
  
Ginny sighed. It was a challenge  
  
Pansy plopped down in exasperation. Yeah, she may as well be out already.  
  
Harry shook his head at his own rotten luck. He was doomed.  
  
Minerva smiled "Let the game begin."  
  
Okay this was just to clarify how you play the game and why they were playing it next chapter the game begins! 


	2. Too Much Vodka

As I promised the game begins!  
  
Dearest Ron, I'm terribly sorry to report that our mother has fallen ill and requests the attendance of all her children in her new quarters at St. Mungos. I'll pick you and Ginny up at eight. Sincerely Charlie  
  
Ron nodded to himself and descended the spiral steps to inform his sibling. He reached the common room and spotted his sister among a group of girls giggling and talking.  
  
"Ginny?" Ron tapped her on the shoulder.  
  
She spun around, agitated. "What?" She demanded.  
  
"We have to go."  
  
"Ron, I'm kind of doing something here." She gestured to Hermione and the rest of the girls surrounding her.  
  
Ron presented the note. Ginny snatched it and skimmed her eyes over it. Her expression changed gradually "As in dying ill?"  
  
Ron shrugged. "All I know is that we have to get to the owlery and let Charlie know we're coming."  
  
Ginny nodded "I'll talk to you later Hermione." With that she and Ron walked quickly from the common room and up the twisting stairs to the owlery.  
  
Ginny immediately began shuffling through the multiple owls. "Okay Ron which owl goes to St. Mungos?"  
  
"Uh, Ginny?"  
  
"Not now Ron! Help me find the owl!"  
  
"Ginny?"  
  
"What?!" She whirled around to lay eyes on a huge water gun. She screamed as the icy water came in contact with her robes.  
  
Ron swallowed, terrified of his sibling's reaction. "Gotcha."  
  
Ginny turned furious eyes on her brother. "Ronald Weasley! I am going to rip your head off your shoulders!" She leapt at him and proceeded to chase him around the owlery, causing the owls a considerable about of stress.  
  
Outside the oak door Draco pressed his ear against the wood, listening intently. He had been sent on an errand by Snape to owl a neighboring school. He had heard yelling and by the segments of conversation he could here he now had two less people to worry about.  
  
Hermione came up the steps, she had been sent to find Ron after Harry requested to see her hairbrush. She saw Draco leaning against the door and walked up to him curiously. "What are you doing?"  
  
"Shhhhh." Draco replied.  
  
"Are you eavesdropping?" Hermione demanded.  
  
"I'm only gathering information about our game." Draco defended.  
  
Hermione shrugged "You don't need it."  
  
Draco lifted himself from the door "Why?"  
  
Hermione brought a water gun from her robes and stuck it in the boy's abdomen. Draco grasped the nozzle and pointed it upward despite Hermione's struggles. He looked her in the eye. "Hermione have you lost your mind?"  
  
Hermione continued to flail against Draco's strength but eventually lost and gave up. "I'm not Hermione."  
  
Draco raised an eyebrow "You have lost your mind, but apparently you drew me so I'll be on the look out love." With that he patted her head and vanished down the steps.  
  
Hermione sighed as the owlery door opened. Ginny and Ron, both covered in feathers, emerged. "Hey Hermione." Ginny said tiredly.  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes heavenward. "I'm not Hermione!"  
  
Just then Hermione's body began to morph into Harry. "Harry!" Ron gasped.  
  
Hermione walked down the corridor leading to the owlery. She passed Draco. "Hi Draco."  
  
"Hey Hermione." Draco took three more steps before he froze. "Hermione?"  
  
He saw her body disappear up the steps and ran after her. Harry dove into the owlery just as Hermione came up the steps. She stood precisely where Harry had just stood to speak with Ron as Draco tore up the stairs.  
  
He stopped dead, everyone was where they were when he had left. He blinked in amazement. Hermione furrowed her brow "Draco? Are you okay?"  
  
Draco nodded, turning slowly and returned to the hallway from whence he came.  
  
Well lets hope this chapter gets more reviews than the last one. 


	3. Who's Next?

I'm back. One down four more to go. Thanks for the reviews all!  
  
Ginny blatantly refused to speak to her youngest brother for the following two days. He bought her two chocolate frogs in apology and was eventually forgiven as night of the third day descended.  
  
Harry sat pensively on the couch, gazing into the ruby flames of his common room. How was he ever going to get this person? There was no way.  
  
Hermione sat gently beside him on the sofa. "Harry? Are you okay?"  
  
He turned his emerald eyes to hers and caught the concern etched there in. "Yes Hermione I'm fine."  
  
Hermione smiled "Good. Stay that way huh?" She rose off the couch and scaled the stairs to her room.  
  
"I just have to do the same old thing, the impossible." He muttered turning back to the flames.  
  
The bell echoed off the stone halls of Hogwarts, signaling to Pansy she had to go to potions now. She gathered her belongings and raced down the seven flights of stairs from the Astronomy Tower. But as she reached the third flight, the staircases shifted, pointing towards Transfiguration.  
  
Pansy rolled her eyes. Well she'd have to run as fast as hell to get to the dungeons in time. Better go. She sped off.  
  
But four corridors down she plowed into a black and orange figure sending her, her things and the other careening into a pile of books and papers.  
  
She cleared her vision and sat up to regard the other "Ron!"  
  
Ron sat up, slightly dazed. "Pansy? Is that you?"  
  
Pansy sighed "Yes Ron. But now I'm going to be late because you were in the hallway."  
  
"Oh." Ron looked guilty. "I'm sorry."  
  
Pansy smiled. He was so cute when he was guilty. "It's okay. Come on" She stood and began to gather her things. He did likewise.  
  
She cast her eyes downward as she picked up her water gun in thought. Ron turned to leave. "Ron?"  
  
Ron turned. She walked over to him and pressed her body against his. "One more thing before you go." She pressed her lips to his as she pulled the trigger of her gun, drenching the red head.  
  
He broke the kiss, shock coating his features. "Pansy?!"  
  
"Gotcha, babe." With that she winked, turned, and strolled to Potions.  
  
Hermione and Ginny tromped up the steps leading to the common room. Ginny told the Fat Lady the password and the door swung open. Ginny went inside. Hermione was following when suddenly an eagle swept down and grasped her homework in its talons, dropping the parchment on the top step.  
  
Hermione ran over to retrieve the parchment, slightly shocked, but as she bent down a stream of water shot just inches from her left arm.  
  
Her head snapped up and she whirled around just in time to see a flash of green and silver.  
  
She dove for her portrait hole and barely made it as it swung shut. She entered the common room and Harry stood at the sight of her.  
  
"Hermione? What happened?"  
  
She shot cold eyes at Harry "Draco." She growled before stalking to her room.  
  
Okay, so send me reviews. Bye! 


	4. Who Has The Hermione?

Three down and three to go. Who will win? Who knows? Oh yeah I do! Anyway, on to the story ************************************************************************  
  
The next morning Draco was seated at his usual position at the Slytherin table. As he raised a slice of toast to his lips, he paused as a sound cut through the room.  
  
"Draco Malfoy!!!"  
  
He turned smoothly in his place to regard the fiery brunette with calm eyes. "Yes dear?"  
  
Hermione narrowed her eyes at Draco. "Ha, ha, come with me." She stalked from the hall and Draco followed her obediently.  
  
She yanked his water gun from the sling on his back. Draco made no move to stop her, just stared at her waiting for an explanation. She examined the gun carefully, before pointing it at him. "You shot at me last night!"  
  
Draco's brows furrowed "No I didn't, I was in the library last night with Pansy."  
  
"All night?"  
  
"Yes. You can ask her."  
  
"How do I know you didn't tell her to lie to me?"  
  
"You don't." He smiled "That's the fun part."  
  
She refreshed her accusation "You did it."  
  
He sighed, pulling the water gun from her grasp and reattaching it to it's sling. He pulled her body into his arms. "Think what you want Hermione, but I plead not guilty."  
  
He squeezed her slightly before turning and reentering the hall. Hermione stood and thought as Harry came up behind her. "I don't think it's him." Harry confessed.  
  
She turned suddenly to give Harry the full censure of her chocolate eyes. "Why?"  
  
Harry shrugged "A hunch." With that he walked past her and to breakfast.  
  
Hermione decided around Potions that Draco was the culprit and therefore not to be trusted. And so she spent the day strategically ignoring and avoiding him. Just as she was heading for the library she found Pansy and the two decided to study together.  
  
They sat at a table and slid their five books across the smooth wood. "Okay Hermione what do you get when you cross wolves bane and flobber worm mucus?" Hermione didn't respond.  
  
"Hermione?" Pansy looked up from her book and was blasted with a crisp spurt of water. When her vision cleared she saw a cringing Hermione and a water gun.  
  
"Sorry Pansy, I had to do it. And besides, I've forgotten half my Potions notes anyway."  
  
Pansy burst out laughing. "Good one girl." She extended her hand in friendship. Hermione shook it.  
  
"In fact I'm gonna tell you who I had. I had Ron."  
  
"Did you get him?"  
  
"Sure did. I guess once you get someone out you'd best keep your guard up." Pansy slid this last part in silkily, a hidden threat beneath.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Wonder who Hermione's murderer is. We'll see. Tootles! 


	5. Never Trust Your Enemies

I realize that very few of you are interested in this story. But oh well, I keep on typing! Next! ************************************************************************  
  
Hermione stepped out of the portal leading to her common room warily. Her boy friend was no where in sight. She breathed a sigh of relief and allowed her water pistol to hang limp in her grasp.  
  
"Hermione?" She whirled around, startled, to see Draco looking at her with confusion.  
  
"Stay back! I mean it." She held her gun threateningly.  
  
Draco smiled. "Some times I worry about you."  
  
"What do you want?" Hermione asked relaxing slightly.  
  
"To walk you to breakfast." Draco said easily.  
  
"Oh, alright." She put her gun in her back pack and took Draco's outstretched hand.  
  
They arrived at the Great Hall and parted smoothly, each walking to their respective tables.  
  
Hermione flopped down opposite of Harry. Harry gave her a worried glance. "Are you all right Hermione?"  
  
Hermione nodded as she stirred her porridge. "Just tired."  
  
Harry nodded, understandingly. Ron joined them with a cheerful look on his face. "Well, that was the best night's sleep I've ever had!" He exclaimed happily.  
  
Harry and Hermione shot him fiery glares. "Wow, you to are just full of cheer aren't you?" Ron's voice dripped with sarcasm.  
  
Once breakfast was over, Hermione headed to the library. She needed some study time to herself and to try and cool the fires of paranoia within her.  
  
She found a table in the corner surrounded by bookshelves. She sat and opened her book quietly. She had not been reading for five minutes when she heard a rustle from around the corner.  
  
"Hermione?" Draco appeared around the corner. "Are you alright?"  
  
Hermione sighed. "Yes Draco, I'm fine."  
  
Draco sat beside her. "I hope you won't take offense if I don't believe you." She closed her book and hung her head. "I'm just tired that's all."  
  
He raised her chin to look at him. "No, that's not all. What's wrong with you?" His silver eyes probed hers.  
  
She heaved another sigh. "I think I'm paranoid." She confessed softly.  
  
Draco smiled "You think? You won't even sit with me in class anymore."  
  
"Well, how can I trust you? I can't when I think you're out to get me twenty four seven."  
  
Draco nodded. "Paranoia or not, I want to study with you tonight in my common room." He invited in a commanding tone.  
  
Hermione shook her head immediately "No."  
  
Draco's silver eyes became sorrowful. He brushed a piece of her hair behind her ear. "Please. . . I miss you."  
  
"Fine. You win. I'll go." Hermione covered her face with her hands.  
  
Draco's whole form brightened. "Thank you dear." He said as he rose and walked away.  
  
"You're welcome." Hermione muttered, allowing her forehead to fall onto the table.  
  
That night Hermione trudged to the dungeons and to the blackened wall of her boyfriend's lair. She whispered the password and the wall slid open to reveal a silver and green decorated common room.  
  
Draco was sitting alone on the deep green velvet couch. Everyone else was already asleep. Draco looked up from the book opened in his lap and smiled. "Hello Hermione. Have a seat." He gestured to the cushion beside him.  
  
She sighed, telling herself that she should trust Draco. He said he wasn't after her and she should believe him.  
  
On the other hand, however, he was a Slytherin and had deceived her plenty before.  
  
No. She told herself firmly. You are paranoid. Go sit on the nice couch with the nice books and the nice fire.  
  
She took a deep breath and sat gently beside Draco. He grinned at her. "Forgot how to walk?" He asked.  
  
"Ha, ha you know I'm paranoid so back off." Hermione shot back, picking up a Herbology book. He placed an arm around her shoulders, causing her to look up at him. He looked her in the eyes. "So you trust me?"  
  
Hermione considered this "I guess so." She began flipping through the pages of her book searching for the correct page.  
  
Draco turned to pick up a book himself, "Hermione?"  
  
"Yes?" Hermione answered still flipping through pages.  
  
"That was your first mistake."  
  
She looked up to see Draco's water gun pointing at her chest. Hermione's jaw dropped, but before she could say anything an icy stream of water shot into her chest, drenching her in freezing liquid.  
  
"Draco Malfoy!!!!!"  
  
Draco shrugged tossing his gun from one hand to the other. "I told you I'd cure your paranoia."  
  
Hermione paused. That was true. He was right. She glared at the platinum blonde in irritation. Then suddenly she lunged at him, gripping his throat in her hands.  
  
He grabbed her wrists with his hands and flipped her body to pin her to the couch. "Hermione! It was just a game. Relax."  
  
She struggled against his hold but got nowhere and gave up with an irritated sigh. "I hate you." She remarked flatly.  
  
Draco laughed "No you don't." He countered, brushing his lips across hers.  
  
"What in the name of Salazar is going on here!" Both students heard professor Snape's voice cause their blood to run cold.  
  
Draco leapt off the couch immediately. "Professor! We were just.. I can explain!"  
  
"Then start explaining." Snape hissed as Hermione rose off the couch.  
  
"We were wrestling and, well, yeah." Hermione said "But ah, it's getting late and I think, ah, I should go now."  
  
"Go on Ms. Granger I'll be sure to report this to Minerva."  
  
Hermione froze. At least she had some time to create an excuse.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
One more chapter to go. Stick around for the fun! 


	6. The End

Okay, so apparently Draco lies. What's new? Onward, ************************************************************************  
  
Harry walked slowly towards Hagrid's cabin pensively. Suddenly the intercom cut the night with McGonagall's voice.  
  
"Will the six students who participated in Gotcha please report to the Great Hall immediately."  
  
Harry sighed turned and sauntered back in the direction he had come, lugging his water gun behind him.  
  
The six students stood in a straight line as Minerva and Snape stood in front of them. Snape cleared his throat. "It has been brought to my attention that the game Minerva designed has come to an end." He stated.  
  
Everyone looked at Draco.  
  
"The winner would be Mr. Malfoy." Finished Snape proudly.  
  
Hermione gave him a death glare. Snape caught this and smiled wickedly. "And I believe you should all line up and congratulate him."  
  
Hermione's face fell in disbelief, but did as ordered though took care to be at the back of the line.  
  
Harry whispered over his shoulder to Hermione. "Don't worry, Hermione, it was just a game."  
  
"Which I lost," She grumbled.  
  
Harry approached Draco humbly. "Draco, there's something I need to tell you."  
  
Draco smiled "Congratulations?"  
  
"No." Harry brought up his water gun fast and shot a stream of water right in to the blonde's stunned face. Harry smiled. "Gotcha."  
  
Draco was speechless as he watched Hermione jump up and down with glee. "But you, and I and them, but they."  
  
Hermione walked over and patted him on the head "It's okay sweety, we'll try big words tomorrow."  
  
Draco shot her with a silver glare, finally getting a grip. He turned to Snape "But you said I'd won." Snape grinned "I thought Mr. Potter was out."  
  
"Well I wasn't, nobody ever got me." Harry injected.  
  
"I had Harry, but Ron got me out before I could get him." Ginny piped up.  
  
So everyone lined up and congratulated Harry and then they were dismissed. Draco caught Hermione's arm as they walked up the steps, bringing her to a halt on the stairwell.  
  
She looked at him quizzically "What?"  
  
His eyes probed her face "You knew, you set this up."  
  
Hermione smiled "You're smarter than you look."  
  
An evil grin crept across the blonde's face. Hermione was suddenly acutely aware that they were alone and that Draco was slightly psychopathic. His eyes glinted mischievously. Hermione took a step back now. "What?"  
  
He took a step forward, she took a step back and came up against the staircase's banister. He closed the gap with a smooth stride.  
  
"What?" She asked more frantically.  
  
"I was only going to return your gun." He said innocently, unhooking her water pistol from her thigh.  
  
He turned and she closed her eyes breathing a sigh of relief. She felt a piercing stream of water hit her chest. She shrieked.  
  
"And take vengeance." Draco said sweetly.  
  
Hermione leapt on him and he caught her before she could plow them both over. Draco smiled, holding her writhing form aloft. "You're beautiful when you're angry." He stated.  
  
Hermione stopped squirming and laughed. Draco lowered her to the ground and pressed his lips to hers.  
  
************************************************************************ The End. Finito, Finale, Done. Finished! Bye! 


End file.
